The Price We Pay.

“Grief starts to become indulgent, and it doesn’t serve anyone, and it’s painful. But if you transform it into remembrance, then you’re magnifying the person you lost and also giving something of that person to other people, so they can experience something of that person.”

Oh, there you are again. I dare to say hello. It’s been awhile since we’ve connected, hasn’t it? Dark. Looming. Painful. You always linger longer than I ask and show up uninvited. I expect you during the holidays and know you’ll show up like clockwork towards the end of July, but deciding to pop up this week without warning was not the kind of surprise I was hoping to be gifted with. Read More

Advertisements

The Year I Learned to Live: 2016

2016 — you were it. While others seemingly found you to be the worst, I found you to be the best. You were my greatest teacher and filled with invaluable life lessons. This year was filled with more growth and love than ever before. Read More

Why LOVE always wins.

14725445_1187719007969284_4486740363566376509_n
Photo credit: Female Entrepreneur Association

There was a time, before social media and the mass instigation it can cause, where life events occurred and then… we simply moved on. We were forced to move on.

No back and forth petty arguments in comment boxes ensued, no posting of passive aggressive quotes and pictures to hurt others — (without having to watch their reactions in front of our face) and no incessant bullying, or on the flip side, preaching without action.

Democracy is fundamentally important because it allows us as a group to decide. We have that right as a privilege and whether “your side” won this year or not, the fact now stands we have a new president elect and no amount of gloating nor angry venting helps either cause.

What it DOES do is continue to divide and further eliminate the healing that is needed now, more so than ever.

It blows my mind to see so many hateful opinions (on both sides) being thrown out with the quick type of emotionally charged fingers to the social media world.

There’s such a disturbing lack of faith in each other as a community and also such an unwarranted arrogance as if any of us have a direct correlation to the pride of the party who won.

When did we start treating our neighbors as our enemy?

Who told us to “be right” is to be first or “to win” is to be better?

Who made us the keeper of another’s emotions or the deciding factor on how people should feel?

Because my social media feed shows me that so many of those around me think they hold that power and in reality, they don’t.

The bottom line is, life goes on and we HAVE to be the reason it does. The power doesn’t lie in one man’s hands, hence, democracy.

Use today’s feelings to move forward and do so in the spirit of life, liberty and the ultimate pursuit of HAPPINESS.

Words matter. And you can’t take words back.

 Love each other – be nice to each other – mind your manners, cast your judgements aside and do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

 I have love for you all – religion, race, gender, sexual orientation and political affiliation inclusive. I will be praying everyday that this love in my heart carries over to assist the change I wish to see on a personal level of those around not me – not just on our countries level.

XO,ASHA.png

Why I Walk

“The first flash of color always excites me as much as the first frail, courageous bloom of spring. This is, in a sense, my season–sometimes warm and, when the wind blows an alert, sometimes cold. But there is a clarity about September. On clear days, the sun seems brighter, the sky more blue, the white clouds take on marvelous shapes; the moon is a wonderful apparition, rising gold, cooling to silver; and the stars are so big. The September storms–the hurricane warnings far away, the sudden gales, the downpour of rain that we have so badly needed here for so long–are exhilarating, and there’s a promise that what September starts, October will carry on, catching the torch flung into her hand.”
Faith Baldwin, Evening Star

Ahhh, yes. The end of September is drawing near. The month’s end brings the release of Summer and the beginnings of Fall. It also brings the annual ALS Association’s: Walk to Defeat ALS® for people “like me”. Read More

Thursday Thoughts

Welcome to a new portion of the website called, Thursday Thoughts! Every Thursday, I will share a quote of the week and in turn, discuss my own thoughts about this quote. Quotes to me are essential to everyday life. Yes I am THAT girl. You know the one I’m talking about. The one who posts quotes as their Facebook status, the #mondaymotivation Instagram poster, the cliche – you need advice – let me throw some of my favorite Oprah inspired passages at you – friend. Mhmm, that is me and it took me a long time to own this and embrace it.

Quotes are words but words are power. To some, quotes are cheesy and sure, I can agree and see both sides. Words don’t provide action and without action, words can be nothing but fluff. The icing on a cake that hasn’t been baked. But on my side of things, you know, the “positive patty” side – wink wink – it’s just so much more. No matter what people may say, we all need inspiration. We all search and long for more than what we know. We all feel lost at times and there’s something in the connection that quotes can provide that bring us back home and in essence, remind us we are not alone by connecting us to someone else’s thoughts and inner voice. There’s no better feeling than knowing that what we’re feeling is justified and valid.

Today’s quote of the week is one I found on one of my favorite Facebook pages: The Female Entrepreneur Association. The Female Entrepreneur Association is an awesome company founded by Carrie Green. This social media mogul has changed the #girl #boss game by teaching other women her secrets, tips and tricks into not only starting your own company but integrating social media into your everyday actions. Quotes are posted daily on their Facebook page and you can check out their website here.

14329995_1159849970756188_102507088035918725_n.png
Image Credit: Female Entrepreneur Association

SOMETIMES THE RIGHT PATH IS NOT THE FASTEST ONE.

I’ll make today’s post short as I’ve already taken up time explaining this weekly addition to my site. So, to put my response to today’s quote bluntly, “A – freaking – men!!!” Who even wants to take the quickest path?! It’s so “easy” – keyword easy – to hope and wish and dream for something to change whether it’s physically, emotionally, occupationally, or romantically. As little girls, we were often fed the fairy tale that dreams come true if you WISH hard enough. Search and find that “lucky” star and the shining beams of light will magically burst upon you and change your world. I surrounded my whole essence with these thoughts. I prayed hard, I wished hard, I spoke to the stars and drew my fairy tales out in my head. And did my dreams appear!? Of course not. All that happened was that years passed me by and I was still the same person, in the same place, with the same hopes and failed dreams.

So what is the “right path” and how do you get there? You get there by starting. You get to anything in life by doing. You get what you want by TRYING.  And more often than not, that path isn’t going to lead you to the answer overnight. You won’t lose your glass slipper and wake up in the morning with a Prince searching for you to hand you what you desire. We all hold the power to save ourselves and we should want to. My thoughts for you today are this: What do you want? What are you reaching for? What goal are you wishing to achieve? Now, how are you going to get there? When you start this path, and you figure this out, start walking but know that you don’t have to run to get there. I hope that you take the time to enjoy the view, that you allow yourself the possibility to take a few detours and forgive yourself for them when you do. The blessing and ultimate accomplishment is always in the journey, my loves, never solely in the end destination.

xo,

Asha

 

 

Bride-zilla or nah?

So, I’ve hit that point. After a 13 month engagement with endless celebrating, social activities and barely any planning other than locking the venue down – check it out and tell me this isn’t a fairy tale garden wedding come true – and hiring a wedding planner, our wedding is somehow now FIVE months away. Five months. Panic has truly set in.

I’m starting to wonder what the heck I did the last 13 months or how in the world time flew by so fast. Even better a question, how do people plan weddings in less time than I have had?! I’ve started to hunker down and get serious about my vendor list and requirements and Excel right now is my best friend. While I have always known I am a “control freak”, this wedding process is truly showing me my strengths and revealing (much to my dismay) my weaknesses. It’s hard for me to not strive for perfection. I’ve been this way since I was a child – so much so, that if something is not perfect, I tend to then flip the script and go the other route of giving up. If it or I’m not perfect – what’s the point? With social media accounts like Pinterest and online websites that basically throw perfect unattainable and unrealistic weddings in your face literally every hour of the day, it’s so hard to not second guess your decisions. Even my wedding dress, that I am absolutely in love with and knew it was the one the second I put it on, has been questioned in the last few weeks as designer dresses fill my instagram feed and I wonder – “should I have included more lace? Maybe a dress more dainty? Should I have looked at other stores before purchasing my dress on the spot? Is my dress to simple? Would I have looked better in a more blinded out sparkly princess dress?!” I have had to breathe a lot as I remind myself that no matter what, I will feel like the bride I want to be and no other decision – dress, venue etc will make the day worse/better.

The more I plan and the more I think about this day – and I think and plan pretty much every second I get, yes even at work between emails and daily contact with clients – the more I’ve been allowing myself to stop stressing and just focus on the love that we will be reveling in that day and forget the rest. I mean, really, flowers for $2,200…are you kidding me? No really, it’s a joke right? At the end of the day, in this case not a phrase, literally at the end of OUR wedding day, those expensive and intricate flowers will be close to dead and only our love will be alive and renewed. Will we remember that the flowers were worthy of thousands of dollars? Or, will we remember the way our guests talked and smiled and laughed as we basked in the glow of our vows and commitment to love each other forever. I’m going with the latter and of course, hoping I’m proved right! 😉 It’s a tricky job to figure out what costs are priorities and what costs are not and I’m sure that this list will vary from bride to bride but the most important thing to remember is the reason any fiancee is even planning a wedding.

After the planning, I will becoming a wife and soon after that a mother if God allows our wishes. Years will pass and life will move fast and I don’t want to look back on this time and think of what I missed as I stressed about the color palette not being “in season” or my bridesmaid dresses not matching and failing to look like the pinterest board I envisioned coming to life in my head.

Dreaming is natural and fairy tales are enchanting – but this kind of love, it’s real and I’m looking forward to moving past this planning and living in wedded bliss.

xoxo